Friday, January 9, 2009

Lessons in History

Days after my first exit were uneventful and fruitless as far as my job hunting is concerned. In a matter of time, I would find myself again in a familiar situation, hopeless, wasted, conspired and unarmed.

They say there are lessons in history but how come I didn't learn. people are supposed to learn from their mistakes but how come I emerged so dumb. The tribulations that pass through our lives are bound to leave an imprint on our experiences either by making us stronger and wiser should the same ordeals come the second time around but how come poorly that I always felt it was my first time. History is repeated. Like it was before, there were pains and agony. Only this time it was deeper and lasting. Never thought it would come.

More than year go, I was on the same crossroad as today. I was working as an OFW, quit my job and deciding whether to go back home or stay to find another job. I went back home instead to be welcomed only by countless miseries, heartaches, financial burdens and sour frustrations. I have walked through boulevards of broken dreams and heading up seemed to be a long shot to a successful journey. In a matter of time, I was out of the country again, believing to be wiser and stronger. Surprise! In four months time, I lost my job again for a more preposterous reasons. This time, I was thinking to go back home or go to hell.

I thought that the first time would be the last. I thought I had enough. I thought I had learned my lessons well. I had admitted my mistakes so easily and I was let unquestioned. I had forgiven myself and all the rest especially my family did understand my decision. The first cut had barely made a scar to remind me of where I have gone wrong once in my fruitful career. So then came another. To say that I am stupid would be an understatement. I was inconsiderate, unreasonable, selfish and have acted on slap judgment. Now everything has come back to me. How I wish I could just make a decision like filling up a multiple choice examination back in my History subject. But it's not how it is. Things have changed now.


  1. Whew! Parang ako. Dito sa Australia pangalawang trabaho ko na 'to ngayon. Iniwan ko 'yong una kong naging trabaho, ta's ngayon ramdam kong may hinahanap-hanap pa rin akong di ko natatagpuan. Siguro walang fulfilment sa job, parang hindi ako masaya.

    Ayaw ko rin namang basta nalang umuwi, kasi katulad ng mga nabanggit mong nga situations, alam kong 'yon din ang haharapin ko kapag umuwi ako sa Pilipinas. Sinasabi pang mahirap ang walang trabaho ngayong may suliraning pang-ekonomiya ang buong mundo. Nagiging mas kumplikado tuloy.

    Sa ngayon tinitiis ko lang, mas ayos na rin to kaysa mangyari ulit ang history last year, January last year wala akong trabaho. History nga 'ka mo. Pero 'pag naiisip kong di ako satisfied sa job ko ngayon, nawawala lahat ang 'lessons in history' na natutunan ko last year na 'yon din ang sinasabi mo rito sa post mo.

    Kaya nga di ako makapag-update ng aking blog kasi mapupuno na naman ng mga sentiments kapag ngayon ako magsulat. Palagi akong nakaka-relate sa mga kwento mo rito, Chico/Kunejo/Sherwin.

    Nasaang bansa ka na ngayon? UAE pa rin ba? Or totoo 'yong sinasabi mong nasa Iran ka na?


  2. and they say habang mah buhay may pag-asa

    nakakapag blog pa nga

    ^_^ carry on ^_^

    that's all i could give you

  3. i feel for you having confusions about my current job now also..and I'm planning to move to another place and I thought it might give me more struggles along the way..

    Happy new year too! =)

  4. Shish Kebab nga pala yu'ng Persian food na sinabi ko, hindi pala Kish. Sorry, nalito ako.

  5. hmmm...

    just hang in there dude. i'm sure you'll figure out a way to pave the path you're on...

    i believe you've learned but there are just circumstances we cannot control...

    keep the faith.