Tuesday, February 16, 2010

Why I Hate (Some) People

This is a risky post. I am talking about hate in times of love. You might not want to further reading thinking your name might appear on the list. Why hate? Is there not enough to love in this world? One of the reasons people cling to their hates so stubbornly is because they sense, once hate is gone, they will be forced to deal with pain. We hate someone because something in him or something that he says has been a part of ourselves for what isn't part of ourselves won't disturb us. Hatreds are the cinders of affections. Hate is misguided love.

It is to the credit of human nature, however, that except where its selfishness is brought into play, it loves more readily than it hates. Hatred, by a gradual and quiet process, will even be transformed to love, unless the change is impeded by a continually new irritation of the original feeling of hostility. Hate is normal.

But it's not that I hate anyone in particular, just some people in general. As I get older, I find that dealing with the rudeness, stupidity and arrogance of other people has become unbearable and unfair.

So why do I hate (some) people, because (some) people are judgmental. It is human instinct. All of us do. But of course, some people judge a little more than the rest of us do. Some people believe they actually have the authority to judge other people, usually judging within the first few minutes of observing and automatically coming to a conclusion. They leave little room for other possibilities. They think if a woman go to pub to work, they'll think she's prostitute; if a man works for a salon, they'll think he's gay. if someone borrows something, they'll think he's starving; if a woman marries a rich old man, they'll think she's a gold digger; if a celebrity transfers to another network, they'll say she's ingrate. Just because people judge doesn't mean they are necessarily wrong…but most of the time they are and that's when judging comes to be so unwelcoming and hurting.

Then I also hate people who are fake and doubled-faced backstabbers. I would rather be told face to face that someobody doesn’t like me than to be talked shit when I am not around. It would be better than having the trouble of thinking to much on who hates me. In the popular "Bridget Jones' Diary," author Helen Fielding calls them "jellyfish" because you can't see their stings coming. Another writer calls them "sniping sneaks." A psychologist who studies the workplace even goes so far as to call them "psychopaths." Whatever the name, most of us have inadvertently backed up into the backstabber's knife. Backstabbers are passive-aggressive. Confrontation to a backstabber is like sunlight to a vampire. So when they're threatened, they lash out sneakily. It is hard to know a backstabber until you've been stung. So don’t ever think that the most charming, nice and pleasant people around is really who they are. If they want something, they can be your best friend. They are aberrant self promoters who'll do anything to profit at the expense of another.

I know I am not the only one who harbor this feelings towards these kind of people. I know you ALSO HATE them, unless you are one of them.


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