Status: Single

The Longer You Wait, the Harder it Gets???

It is so funny and actually embarrassing, when you’re a guy and thirty and single and people around you start to think something isn’t going right. Well, can’t totally blame them if things like these play around their heads, typical Filipino men have families at age thirty while some of them are contemplating on ways of getting out of it. As for those who opt to stretch the selection process, there are only a handful of reasons for that, either you’re gay and never really fancies traditional family setting, or you’ve been through miserable childhood and just making up for the lost times enjoying, or you think you’re not ready yet as other priorities in life such as careers, breadwinning, lifestyle are taking your busy time. If any of the mentioned excuses hurt you so bad you wish you're younger, then just think of the more subdued, God hasn't given you the one and as the cliché goes, it's not yet time.

As human beings, judging instead of understanding is easier to say and do. But actually, no one can really surmise and you can never appreciate unless you fill in their shoes, what’s behind the truth that if you walk the road single far too long looking for all the beautiful stuff, then you might miss the altar hiding somewhere the ugly bushes. For some, being single means searching for the perfect partner or allowing someone to find the perfect you, but it does rarely happen. Beauty and genuine happiness are beyond skin-deep. For some, being single could mean sacrificing your own life for the sake of others. Sounds noble huh? Why do you think the Philippine President is still single? Because he is serving a bigger cause far from his own. Each single person has a battle to win. Be it a small one or big time, far from being an excuse, this reservation as to why some people are not yet married is unquestionable.

Many OFWs around the world are single. To say they run the world might be an overstatement but to the families they belong to, probably it’s not. Take me for example; I am single because I support my entire family in every financial ways. I couldn’t afford to settle down as it would mean cutting my sustenance to them and that’s something that they wouldn’t want to happen very soon. If you’re married and you still send three quarters of your salary to your immediate family, it might look unfair and offensive to your better half. Being single is a choice. It’s a choice that lets you help your family make a living and at the same time, exempt you from hurting others by not involving partiality in a married life.

In a circle of friends and in casual conversation, oftentimes the singles are the subject of cynical scrutiny. It takes a brave heart to actually deal with it knowing what they say has factual basis. We have reasons and their unfamiliarity with those reasons serves as basis for them to play around. If you’re a woman, being in the same situation is even more pressing when the so-called freedom takes the form of a predicament. It hurts sometimes that you get to take all the pains from people’s judgment because of the responsibility that you have chosen to fulfil. They make you question who and what really is important in life. Bu in the end you realize it’s not what or who, but why. Our lives are not defined by statuses. Our meaning equates to the joys we bring to our family and the contribution we extend to the society in general.